Jim Foster

My family and I are deeply sorry for all that Vice-President Cheney and his family have had to go through this week. – Harry Whittington, after Dick Cheney shot him in the face.

This bozo was even at this year’s Canadian Open. What I don’t understand is how he got up here.

Deanna, as everyone knows is half-human and half Betazoid and sometimes at bedtime can be seen wearing this sheer… excuse me I have to go and lie down.

Yes, today I am offering you a piece of the action, the opportunity to get in on the ground floor of the J. Paul Humble Medonte Mountain Time-Share Resort.

Mary said John won’t let me say ying-yang. I said, yes he will. I’ve read what he says on Facebook.

It is always a bit of a shocker when we see pics of famous movie stars as they are now. Even some of the sexiest woman of the 50s and 60s seemed to have aged somewhat.

I wish I could write something that will live forever, other than my, ‘only a Canadian would have invented the bra. That’s like building a Cadillac with no doors. The only way to get in is climb through the back window,’

In this day and age we forget how important a thumb is. It was the difference between life and death in the Roman Empire.

Even that fine Shakespearean actor, Jackie Chan would be in danger. Although I’ve seen some of his movies and that wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing.

I better fill you in on the latest tragedy in the Sunshine City.