The Burning Question – What Next?
A Geezer’s Notebook, By Jim Foster
I envy you people. Most of my readers, maybe even both of them, are quite capable of watching a movie, enjoying the story, then moving on to the next one. Alas, I cannot. I would like to, but I get too emotionally involved and when it is over I try to continue the story in my mind. I would like to think of myself as a cinematic analyst, but I’m not, I am a whack job. Movies end and most normal people leave it there and go to bed; but not me, I watch the credits to see who was the Gaffer, the Best Boy and even the caterer. I check out who wrote the background music, then settle back and worry about what will happen to all the cast the next day, and maybe for years in the future.
Last night we watched You’ve Got Mail since we had only seen it 12 or 13 times before. We hoped for a bit of full-frontal nudity this time, at least I did, but no, it was much the same as the other times we’d seen it. We even remembered the dialogue which is a good thing if you have to go to the bathroom.
Apparently Meg Ryan showed her bare back in When Harry Met Sally but I didn’t get to see it. From what I remember, Meg said the f-word earlier. Mary pulled the plug and carried the TV out to the road. It had been picked up and gone by the time she got back to the front door. It’s a religious thing. When she was little, Mary went to a Baptist or Salvation Army Sunday school (I can’t remember which, one of those weird Eastern religions anyway) and the f-word and one or two hundred more is on their hit lists.
As I was saying, you probably know the Mail movie backwards and forwards but at the end Meg (Kathleen Kelly) finally learns Tom Hanks (Joe Fox) her mysterious on-line friend, is the man who put her out of business. She hated him for a while, but now loves him. It is all very confusing. Everyone else in the whole world is happy with the ending – except one person, me.
I’m worried about Brinkley, Joe Fox’s dog. After Joe and Kathleen finally stop the kissy-kissy business in the little park on the west side, where are they going to go? Joe lives on a boat and Meg said she could never love a man who owns a boat. So his place is out. Romancing with one seasick partner throwing up can put a strain on a relationship especially if you are the partner holding the bucket.
Kathleen lives in an apartment. I don’t know for sure but I doubt pets are allowed in her building? If they aren’t, Brinkley is going on a one-way trip to that big kennel in the sky. Some harsh decisions are going to have to be made. Meg is beautiful, but putting Brinkley down– is she THAT beautiful?
There are always problems in love story movies especially when Tom and Meg are the stars. It isn’t about their love; we know they will end up together, the problem is the endings.
Do you remember the closing moments of Sleepless in Seattle. Tom and Meg finally meet at the top of the Empire State building at midnight on Valentine’s Day. It is simply wonderful and we know they will be together forever. Tom looks into her eyes and says ‘We have to leave’ and takes her hand and they go to the elevator and then to – to where? Jonah, the silly little ass booked a flight from Seattle, Tom did the same thing. They never booked ahead, now there they are, the three of them at midnight in New York City with no place to go. And even if they find a room somewhere and Tom gets lucky what are they going to do with Jonah, make him stand out in the hall?
And what about Victoria? She is waiting for Tom in a Holiday Inn back in Seattle and she had a bath and everything. Unless Tom prepaid the room with his credit card she is going to be stuck with the bill and probably a bar tab that will knock her socks off and she didn’t even plan to wear socks.
And we can’t forget Meg’s ex-fiance, Walter, she dumped him. Not only that he is stuck with his mother’s wedding ring (you remember she had fat fingers and he had to have it sized) a 10 piece set of china, because 8 isn’t enough and 12 is too many.
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