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Jim Foster

Jim Foster columns

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Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

I Could Be A Contender, But…

April 14, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

I’m afraid I developed quite a reputation and to this day my picture is on the wall at Danforth Tech with a big red circle around it and an “X” across my face.

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Entertainment Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Ay, To The Proof

April 7, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

His writing style is much improved although as I mentioned previously, his hand-writing is abysmal. If it doesn’t improve in the next semester, we may have to insist he switch to pre-med.

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jimfoster
Entertainment Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Sage Advice For Young Men

March 31, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

Marriage is a partnership and as in most partnerships there is a Senior Partner and a Junior Partner.

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Entertainment General Jim Foster Latest News 

Fragmented Memories (The Wrap Up)

March 24, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

Overnight we stopped being snotty-nosed little kids and became men of the world, bon vivants if you will.

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Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Fragmented Memories (Next To Last)

March 17, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

For a guy who was supposed to be so damn smart about jungle stuff, he was one dumb bunny if you ask me. For the life of me, I could never see what Jane saw in him.

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jimfoster
Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Fragmented Memories (Smack In The Middle)

March 10, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

Now I love Sharon, although I wish she’d stop calling me, but Sharon would be blown away if she ever slapped leather with Alan Ladd or Jack Palance.

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jimfoster
Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Fragmented Memories (4 More Parts, Really?)

March 3, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

Someone in the crowd should have called out, “We’re the Chosen People and we have to cut the ends off our what?”

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jimfoster
Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Fragmented Memories (In 5 Parts)

February 24, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

If Sound of Music was an accurate portrayal of a pre-war Austrian’s sex life, I’m surprised there are any new Austrians at all.

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jimfoster
Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

I Think, Therefore I…

February 17, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

I remember some words I learned in Grade 11 French but not all. I found out much to my chagrin that ‘merde’ does not mean ‘thank you’ and the lady who owned ‘le magasin’ washed my mouth out with ‘salon’ (turned out she was Italian and couldn’t speak French either.)

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Featured General Jim Foster Latest 

Works Every Time

February 10, 2019September 28, 2019 Sunonline/Orillia Humour, Jim Foster

That was extreme of course; most cases of bad judgement only result in 6 or 7 months in Intensive Care.

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